At home, faith has often felt like a choice. Here it is a necessity. The things I chose to fall back on education, family, a home were my first line of defense against fear. They were my strongholds. My trust in God offered some sense of comfort but for the most part what I owned and who I had by me were my securities.
If I was in trouble or in need I could always get back on my feet. I was secure in my possessions, in my abilities and in my relationships. So many in Uganda have only God as their security and I've been questioning what it would be like if I truly relied on God for my needs. What that kind of faith would look like and the changes it would mainifest in my daily life.
Are any of my sources of security because of my will? No, and yet I have attributed my blessings as rights I have earned. How humbling it is to be reminded that I am and have nothing God has not given me through his mercy. There have been times God had felt like an accessory in my life as though I would be fine, just fine, without him. I have doubted him because I did not feel I needed him. The things I believe keep me safe and secure are not reasons to doubt God but to believe in his presence and goodness even more
Those in need in Uganda do not have the luxory of doubt. They rely on God with such steadfastness. They depend on God to provide them their next meal, for healing from terrible disease and for somewhere safe to sleep. I hope to adopt that kind of faith. The kind that places all its trust in God alone. Being in Uganda is inspiring and at times painstakingly humbling. God continues to reveal his magnitude, goodness and limitless love.
