Sometimes things happen that we just don’t understand. Actually, a lot of times things happen that we will never understand. I will never understand why we spent 11 hours addressing and stuffing 3500 envelopes. I will never understand why people know that Jesus died for them and that He is the only way to heaven but say they are not “ready” to confess that with their mouths and become “born again”. I will never understand why there are so many starving and malnourished children. I will never understand the injustice in this country. I will never understand why God rescued baby Moses and 2 months later brought him up to heaven. I will never understand the feelings of anger I have for child sacrifice or the feelings of a shattered heart for baby Moses even though I know he’s in a better place. There are just so many things that we will never understand. But on the other end of the spectrum, I will never understand the mercy that the Lord has, or the peace that surpasses understanding, or the joy that comes in the morning, or the unconditional love that God has for me, or why He would ever send His only son to be our atoning sacrifice. There are just so many things that we will never understand.
But then again, how could I understand a world where from my point of view, I am the “main character” in my life, I can only see the world through my opinions, emotions, thoughts, and feelings. I can only see the world from a sinful nature point of view. Thank goodness that the Lord holds the world in the palm of His hand. Thank goodness that He has given us freedom and we are not just robots without any choice in this world.
This trip has taught me that things happen… and they may hurt… they may even shatter your heart… and I will never ever understand why… but it’s not my job to figure out why things happen, it’s my job to just live, it’s my job to love God and love people, I’m suppose to spread the love of God to the ends of the earth. If I knew why things happened, would that even be beneficial? Would I even be able to fathom all of the factors that may play into one situation? Would knowing why things happen change the way I live my life? Who knows? It doesn’t really matter. The only thing that matters is that when things happen that I don’t understand that I choose to trust in the Lord. I choose to live out my faith and bless the name of the Lord. I choose to let God do what God does best, take care of His children, and do what I am called to do, love God with all my heart, soul, mind, and strength. And I’m okay with that, because I don’t understand how big God is, I don’t understand His compassion, I don’t understand His grace, and I don’t understand His love, because it is sooo gosh darn big, and I take comfort in that.
